I'm Not Enough

This article is especially written to pastors, but applies to anyone willing to admit they occasionally fall short or perhaps more often than one might wish to admit. When this happens, is it an indication of the absence of God? Not necessarily. The Old Testament man named Job thought he did everything well until calamity hit his own family. So startling was the series of bad news, that even his friends and wife questioned Job’s authenticity.

Have you done all you can and the outcome you prayed for and labored for, just did not manifest? Did you pray long enough? Did you pray for the right things? Did you know what proper thing to pray for? These questions may swirl as you and I attempt to understand what happened. We hunger for an explanation so that we may arrive at a better outcome in the future. But if you are like me [and you are], we don’t always know what happened. We are left confused. We may even doubt our connection to God or being divinely appointed to the office we occupy. We may even ask, “Did God call me?” If God did, has He removed the mantel or anointing? Why is my effectiveness lessened or faded?

Take heart. You are not alone. The Bible is filled with men and women who fell short of the requirements of the moment. Moses lost his temper and thus lost the opportunity to enter the Promise Land. David fell short and missed the opportunity to build the temple for God. Martha fell short in her zeal of hospitality, when she was more focused it rather than the most important thing, yet her sister Mary got it right, at least in that moment. Peter fell short and missed the opportunity to witness to the people when Jesus was arrested. Paul fell short in kicking John Mark to the curb because of the perceived lack of dedication. We too fall short because of our own imperfections.

Can we be honest with ourselves? Can we admit that we are limited and flawed. Yet God accomplishes the unimaginable with us. What about the times when the unimaginable does not happen? We may wonder why this pastor mantel is so heavy. Perhaps it is heavy to weigh us down and keep us grounded. Grounded so that none may boast in self, but rather praise God when the incredible happens.

Why is this important? If we had every prayer request answered and every desire satisfied, then why lean on God? Why is faith needed? This is going to sound trite, but I am glad I don’t have that type of power. For sure, I would call down fire to consume some people. I would avoid healing some who I believe are undeserving. I would move as if I was God, deciding the fate of others. NEVER! Such a role is beyond my pay grade. Surely, I would foul up things and unravel heaven. Again, NEVER! God does not allow us to separate the wheat and the tares because we would surely pluck up the wrong vegetation. He retains that authority for Himself. Afterall, we are limited, but He is not.

God is God. He does not need a committee. He does not always provide answers to the curious. That is the beauty of being sovereign. Yet, in God’s sovereignty, He engages us in the outcome. We rejoice when the miraculous happens and our prayer requests become reality. However, when the opposite happens, it seems like it was all for naught. Let’s not be too quick to judge the outcome. God is not playing 3-D chess. First of all, He is not playing and if He did, the dimensions would be unlimited, rather than only three. No wonder His ways are not our ways and His thoughts higher than our own.

So, the bottom-line message to the pastor, parent, witness, spouse, friend, or relative is to remain faithful to what God requires of you. Focus on your faithfulness and less on the outcomes. Do not think of yourselves more highly than you ought. We simply plant or water but it is GOD who gives the increase. This level of humility will soften the blows when we seem inept, and the outcomes seem to fall short.

Remain faithful and trust the infinity-D (not 3-D) God, Who has it all worked out – timing and outcome. Keep wearing the heavy mantel. Trudge up the necessary hills. Stay true to the calling, whether to minister or witness. Be that leaf in the hurricane and move at the flow of God - surrendered, willing, and poised for every good work. This is the will of God for our lives. Hold the line…